Fall Excitement

As I sit here, in the cool Monday morning winds of Puget Sound, I feel FALL arrive, slowly. The nights are in the low 50's and tonight it will descend to high 40's. I love Fall, as I am a September 9 baby. Sometimes I think about my mother, in her pregnant, Danise-state, walking next to the Susquehanna River, that summer, awaiting my arrival. 

Susquehanna River

My old, Pennsylvania home is like a compound, as grandparents, aunt and uncles' homes all sit above the river, and behind us is my grandparent's, 400 acre mountain. Every summer, those from afar, gather in their summer homes, as we jump off the dock and water-ski across the river.Some paddling canoes, at morning, to the island, where my father and his cousins  put up the giant rope, that swings out, above the river, jumping and dumping us into the cool waters. I could not get back for our July 4 celebration this year, but next year is on the agenda.

White Pines on the Mountain

It was where, one fine frozen winter, I went over a 50 foot high cliff on a tobaggon, after Eddie S. and my brother, convinced me, to let them give me a Big push, down the side of the mountain. I lost control of the ropes, and flew off across the cliff, airborne, amazed to land in a soft pile of 3 foot snow, on the mountain road below. 

Pure excitement broke from my lungs, as I landed, excited that I had gone off the cliff, landed safely and all my friends above stood with mouths open, and none could claim such an adventure.

It was a great story for a few days, around dinner tables, where parent and relatives' lectures abounded with, "You should be more careful", or "how could you do that to your sister?". Fun was the operative word and no broken bones for the Academy Award of tobogganing.  Perhaps, that is where my fearlessness comes from, whenever I travel around the world. That moment of going over the cliff, led me to believe I would also be taken care of by the great snow-God above, anytime, anywhere.

Copyright 2010 Codekas

My home now is next to a 40 acre mountain, which sits 200 feet above the Puget Sound.  I realize why I like it so much, as it is part of a memory, from a childhood spent roaming the mountains and waters of Pennsylvania.

I know a lot of people don't like to remember their childhood. Bad memories or sad ones are connected to them. Somehow, we all need to find our little piece of heaven on earth. Sometimes, we do. 

I have found a few places to love. Some big cities and some small, like Kaapa, Kauai;

Santa Fe, NM; Oceanside,Ca.; and Eze, France. Someday, I may return to live in Hawaii, as that is where I was living, before I came back to the mainland,to visit my parents and attend my sister's wedding in Seattle. Mount Rainier was shining and the Puget Sound was sparkling, and the trees and mountains reminded me of my Northeastern birth place. 

My Puget Sound View from the House

It felt like home. Wherever you live, be grateful. You have a roof over your head, warmth in the winter, flowers in the summer. Feng-Shui is the Art of Placement and if you have never studied it, you should. It will help align the energies of your apartment, office or home, to what is the most abundant and energetic for you and your family.

Today, I will spend the day divesting myself of old, unused or frivolous objects, accumulated over the past few years. Some of those things, may be hard to release. However, I am assured, by universal principles, that all that I need will be provided me, as long as I am on my path, and pursuing my soul's purpose on earth. Not that, I always do that, as Virgo's, like myself, get distracted easily by miraculous views and enticing subjects, or spend hours reading through old manuscripts.

I am a researcher, if not a writer, and delve into the depths of those things that interest me. Some of those interests take me around the globe, like when I embarked on the quest for Marian spiritual centers, in the Mediterranean, one year. Another interest was gurus in India, and that interest led to a 4 year pursuit, delving into the basics of Eastern spirituality and beliefs, with months spent in India, Thailand and Malaysia.

Today, I await my brother, who decided to return to the East Coast, to visit family there, and looking forward to hearing, about his adventures, from his 2 drives across the country. I am sure, his views on what he saw, in towns and countrysides, will enhance my understanding of what we, as a nation, are experiencing as we let go of precious homes and objects in order to sustain our lives. 

Closed stores, abandoned homes and farms abound, he will reveal as he drives through Virginia, Indiana, Missouri, Nebraska, Wyoming, and Idaho. Like Robinson Crusoe, he will have tales to tell and challenges along the way. Even, thoughts of turning back, to Williamsburg, at one point, when his truck and trailer encountered a breakdown, somewhere in Missouri. That question, we all ask ourselves, when faced with a change of plans, or our dreams, "shall I continue or is this a sign to stop and go back?" 

Copyright 2010 Codekas

At that point, it is time to sit down and ask yourself what is the purpose of this adventure? What is it I am here to learn? Why do I need to be here, doing this? Why must I continue on? What I am running back to? 

Find that place to sit down, breath, and smile into the day. 

It is not the destination, as we all know, it is the adventure which completes us. Some of us are on the path to find love, some of us are running from it. Some of us hope to find an answer to what we should be doing with our lives, and all of us are seeking peace. 

One day, I came upon this wonderful sculpture, walking the Canyon Road in Santa Fe. I had traveled from Seattle to San Francisco for Christmas and then went out to the Southwest to enjoy New Year's with friends. 

Copyright 2010 Codekas

I had ended a relationship, in my head, about a man,  who had not been very interested in pursuing, any relationships.Gazing upon this horse, into the sky, and breathing that wonderful, crisp mountain air, realized I had not been very much into a relationship, either.It would have been a step back into the past, with someone familiar, comfortable, to me. We do that sometimes. 

Return to old patterns, old loves, because that which we really need, we are afraid to pursue, as they are scary, dangerous to self-worth, and what if that which we find, we really want, does not want us? 

What if they live too far away? What if it could be dangerous because we have been pursued because of our beauty, wealth, position? What if they are the passion which excites our soul? 

That one person, from the moment we looked in their eyes, knew that the wonders of the universe were there for the taking, and in taking  we could be lost forever to our old selves, and the safety in the past?Sad, how many walk away from passion and the soul's knowledge, that this is the One. Sad.

I was looking for something, that was more powerful than a man-woman relationship. I was looking for peace with my life, and realized, my life had to find its way back, into daily actions, from the core of my being. My writing and my photography sustain that now, and if it had not been for that crazy jump, into trying to find someone to fill the loneliness,  I could have found balance; we could have remained friends. The power of the horse, the freedom and magnificence of its nature, reminded me of mine. The release of the confusion and anger took place, in that moment, as I sat and gazed at this forceful, commanding work of art. 

I am about to take another trip, into the desert, soon. A place of great power and mystery. A place, that I really do not enjoy, because of the heat of the day. 

It will be somewhere to enjoy the mysteries, of secret power on earth. I will meet new humans, along the way. Be challenged with all types of bodily requirements, and listen to music, see vistas, new food and art along the way. 

Sometimes, we place ourselves in environments, unlike our perfect ones, at home, in order to fulfill a need of the heart, or find answers to questions that spiral the same paths, through our brains, over and over again.

It takes a massive amount of energy to release old patterns, to release beliefs about ourselves that are not serving our higher selves. I push myself away from the safety belts in order to find that piece, of my personal puzzle, which no one else holds. 

Sometimes, I need to go into the desert or walk outside in a rainstorm. It is worse to wonder, quietly in a house, knowing the urge to the quest is being suppressed out of fear, for me. There is only so much time I have in my life. So much time to experience the wonders my soul drives me toward.

Do something different this week, without analysis. Do it only because you thought of doing it, without fear present at the moment you desired it. Erase every thought of hesitation and analysis that arose after your little heart said, let's do this now. 

You are only as strong as your next adventure; 

you become your true self in doing those things 

in which you stop listening to your old, fearful self.