copyright2011 Danise Codekas
What is it about dreams that seem to follow you about the day? Had one last night and it was all too real. I could touch myself in it and it was me as an old, old woman, sick and dying. Just an internal memo from the higher self to kick into gear my new exercise program now. Not that it was a scary dream, only that it was so clear that if your body is not cared before, you won't be able to care for yourself when it falls apart and you are still breathing. Simple data, no?
I did a lot of driving today, through valleys and up mountain roads and realized I need a chauffeur. There is a point where holding the wheel after 2 hours seems pointless. Would be nice if the wheel was mind controlled. I could sit in the seat and give the name of the exit I want to get to, and the car would go there. We have expanded the technological advancements in the automobile. It is now time to hook up our bodies and brains to those computer chips under the hood.
I watched a friend fry eggs and bacon, the on hood of his old Chevy pickup, in the middle of the Sonora desert one day. If you can cook eggs and bacon on a car hood, then surely they can install a mini-micro oven behind the back seat of my Subaru. The back seat should fold down to reveal a laminated top,with utensils sheathed inside plastic tubes along its sides. Instead of a back of a seat, a mini oven warms some brie, roasted red peppers and french bread, for snack time.
The ability to have what we need, when we want it, seems to be stalled in human development sequence. The reverse is more true, during these times of world financial keep-your-eye-on-the shell games. Now, most people want something and have no ability to have it. More people are beginning to pull away from the false impressions impressed upon them by their social groups, friends and fans.
We are crawling into ourselves and away from preconceived ideas of what we are to others. Trying to satisfy what someone thinks I should be doing is a futile exercise in madness. You may know about this experience. You decide to be with someone, for instance, and before you know it the next thought about where a relationship is headed is dictated not be your personal insights and true beliefs. It is guided by an other's ideas, of what your life or commitments should be like, which become staid, de-evolutianary and uninspiring, if you are not able to pull you head out of your butt, in time, to realize you are doing something you really never wanted to do.
Of course, some of this is your fault, of course. Like you were lonely, scared, frightened, thought it would boost your career or sell some books, or Cd's. Thought it would be cool. I rode a number of waves, in ocean's created in other people's minds. In the end, thank god, the undertow grabbed me and held me down, until everything put in my head, by other's words or beliefs, was gone. The first breath became filled only with my own air. No one else's.
I am really pushing myself to the edge this past month. I create scenarios with these old beliefs stuck in my head, and ingrained into the cellular memory of my body, and kind of just let go of being rationale, reliable, responsible and retaliatory. I am being peaceful.
Maintaining breath in the whirl of self-created immolation and destruction, in order to arise without anyone else's beliefs dictating any of my personal movements or decisions. It is really hard. I am thinking I might appear a bit crazed to some people.
My body always reflects, to the outside world, exactly what is going on internally. even yours does. Trying to hide what is in your eyes, or tension in your muscles, is impossible. The acuity to read one another, physically and emotionally, over the past two years has expanded exponentially in our human psyche's, as we race toward another leap in human development.
Anyone still eating fruit and vegetables covered with petro-chemicals and grown on land pumped full of agri-business bio-waste refuse, needs to wake up fast. What you put in your body, feeds your mind. Failing to put the most natural into your body, holds the entire human race back from achieving higher potential. What we put in our mouths and chew and use for energy, either brings about genetic evolution for the species, or holds us all back until a un-specified millennial, DNA evolutionary event.
I sat and watched as a tractor gathered the new felled wheat from a large field near Grand Mound, today. They had rolled about 20, 25 ft. high, round wheat bales. They probably had another 200 to go, based on the acreage of the field. It felt really good just sitting and watching them gather and roll the bales, into ever larger rounds, like big, thick cinnamon donuts, with the hole filled.
Watching a part of my food chain process became a moment of wonder, for a few minutes. I know some of you like to sit and watch your tomatoes grow, moment by moment. For me, watching a baler roll hay, or a group of wild horses jump across a gully, is how nature gets me to honor it. Today, a young doe, feasted on my two rose bushes beside the front door. I looked out when I say this long, sleek tan hided body, standing on the front porch.
Her head was just rocking back and forth as she went from from rose to the other, and by the time she left, about a dozen roses were gone. I didn't care. I have loads of roses. She was getting the best meal of the day, by the way she was eating with her eyes close, totally blissed out. I had never seen a deer on the porch before. I am glad my roses are a delicacy for the deer kingdom. I sat in my chair, by the door, and watched her for about 10 minutes. I was as happy as she was because she was beautiful and happy.
Simple elegance, food, emotions, relationships are what I seem to reaching for now. What about you? Too much drama? Not enough peace? Smell the roses, do your tai-chi, walk barefoot across the creek, and keep your hands on the wheel, until you come up with something better, that keeps your life, as your life, and not a stranger's dream.
If you love someone and still cannot tell them, then you may as well quit kidding yourself about the fact that it was meant to be. It will never be until you take action. If they were the one for you, the only one the universe sent you and you walked on by, then stop kidding me and yourself, you are still looking. True love comes rarely.
Once in a lifetime is a humongous event. Twice, in a lifetime, beyond any equation. If you are with someone, you realize does not meet you as a whole, 100% heart, then they will drown you, until the big undertow comes to rescue you, again.
Never regret ending a relationship that your entire physical and emotional system says is toxic for you and your mission on earth. Most people stay in toxic relationships and you know many of them. Bravery and Courage is always required when acknowledging true love. They are also required when it is not anything else than an illusion, created by you, because you were afraid to do the right thing.
All that is happening in the world is we are creating our own reality and finally we all know it. No one to blame for your unhappiness, depressions or fears, except your own failure to follow your heart. In order to follow your heart it would be a good idea to keep it as healthy as possible until you give yourself permission to become a whole, loving person again able to receive love from another, as you. You cannot use a group's mission, another person's needs or your past history as excuses for that which you know you need in your life now.
You or I do not have time to fool around with the speed with which our cosmic destinies are coming at as, every day a new one hits me, and I do not have time or energy to hold onto the past and grab the present. either take the present moment and make it what you are, give it what it demands, love that which it offers, or head on back to the farm, and plant some new seeds, if there are any left. This cosmic dance is you and me dancing together with every molecule across the universe.
Affecting one another and loving each other. Evil always seeks to destroy itself which means that once it is gone only love exists. Go for love, health and staying in present time, with your heart and feelings. Anyone comes along who is willing to walk along side of you, without requiring you to carry them, that's the one you want to be with.
That is the one you will be having fun with and the one who will understand the real meaning of joy. Joy is good. That is what we are made of and it is that which you and I stop and feel in those moments in the fields of regeneration and expansion and while we gaze in delightful amazement, smelling the rose bushes of life.
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