Copyright2010 by Danise Codekas
One of the great joys about traveling is you never know what is going to happen next,
even if you plan on a the next moment taking place. Realistically, this could be my last breath, and I try to keep balance in my life by repeating that thought, to myself ,whenever I am afraid to take action, or if something comes along of such an unusual nature, and I hesitate to appreciate its power, to possibly rip me out of my habitual activities; the ones which we all follow, in somnolence, which,i f stopped, can lead us into a new dimension, paradigm or relationship, or get us killed.
Spent most of the day writing, talking, eating, and cogitating. If I don’t write every day, my gyroscope gets a little wobbly and something begins knocking against my brain, which is usually another part of the story which needs to be released into the cosmos. As I get closer to the end of my life, my life speeds up in order to experience as much of life as it can before heading into other worlds. I can sit for hours thinking, as all of us do from time to time. Writers’ tendency to find the explanation for their feeling or experience, sometimes takes decades, before the explanation and realization arises, as to what actually changed them and why they chose the path they did at the time.
Luckily, the understanding, of how it all fits, into their world, and affects the outer worlds, of their existence, occurs in a split second of clarity, and in my experience, the realization and understanding involves a sentence or word, which encompasses the totality, of whatever it was I was trying to figure out. I tend to believe that most people are incredulous when the truth reveals itself, and it is always overshadowed by one of the simple laws of the universe. I had a few of those moments today.
One of the joys of spending time with friends is the reflections of self, that are mirrored back during conversations. You get to experience the truth about yourself and also see how far away from crazy you are located, or, how close to madness, you were before the reflections appeared in the mirror. Friends do that for one another, usually without realizing their importance to you. It is nice to let them know you value them, and today I bought my friend a new tea pot, as thanks, for her reflections. Now, I know a tea pot is not a big offering for such a gift, however, my friend and I have spent many tea pots of time together, discussing our lives and dreams, throughout the decades of our friendship.
We have shared friends with one another. I gave her my best friend, Cyndy , when I moved out of San Francisco. She was there while Cyndy was dying, a year I would choose to forget forever.
When I gave the eulogy, to a few hundred of Cyndy's friends and family, realizing how the connections would grow across time and space, I never imagined 15-20 years later, I would meet John, tonight at dinner, who knew Cyndy, because of another simple introduction between friends, once again proving the theroy --Three Degrees of Separation . My friend, in turn, has introduced me to her friends, which prove to be interesting, insightful and adventurous, in one way or another. A girl needs adventure, a writer needs the insights of others, and my life needs to be interesting, in order to continue on paths, which can be lonely, challenging and introspective.
I am here to see if San Francisco can be home again. Walking the streets tonight, enjoying the city, made me realize I have missed walking city streets. There is always something of interest, something that catches the eye, something that makes an impression. It is fodder for a writer, as are the mountains and wild animals that lay at my feet, in the Pacific Northwest. I love both. Which do I need now? Which environment will bring me to the next indicated thing in my life. That is what I am here to discover. My decision to change my life again is in process; where that leads me is still unknown, however, the quest is now in process, and eventually the answer will arise for me.
Every aspect of life feeds creativity in me. I will enjoy doing some more investigating into the charms of the city, tomorrow, when I visit the Asian Art Museum, with no plans for the rest of the day. That is the plan and plans change. It is 5:02 am and tomorrow is now today.
I think planning is sometimes overrated by those who are afraid to leap, when the universe sends in a curve ball, or a person who is a little crazier than you and not afraid to break down a few doors, to find treasures. They do not care if there is no treasure. The only thing, that is important, is they tried to do it. The act of trying is just as important as breaking down the door, and finding possible surprises. Don’t pretend to be interested in life, then shirk from it, when someone offers you an opportunity, to create a little havoc in your life.
Plans are meant to be changed: they are only ideas, not reality. It does not become reality, until you are breaking into places, which you had not planned to enter, and realize you always were meant to be there. You don’t have the key to the door, but you are sure, that what lies beyond is more important, more exciting, than what you planned on doing that day, and you never needed the key anyway.
I am tired from all the fun, today, filled with interesting conversations and the best chicken sambucca, cooked by my caring friend. We enjoyed it with one of her favorite people, who was thoroughly entertaining, erudite, and well-read, and was never afraid to break into new sociological paradigms, where he was not invited, but once he got in, bringing others along with him, he knew they would enjoy the journey, once they realized they were holding the keys. All they had to do was realize anything is possible, even the improbable: a visionary and humble man, all wrapped up in energetic visualizations, who transformed the lives of thousands of people, without many of them realizing, he was and is a catalyst for change.
How many of us get to meet a creative visionary, who helped create an artistic, transformative paradigm, during their lifetime? He may not like this acknowledgement, since that humble, down-to-earth, sincerity is there too, however, he is not afraid to act, which shakes the world out of its somnolence. People like him, take you to the edge of your reality, then jump over the edge, right along side you, knowing all along, that the ride through space has to happen before the next indicated thing arrives.
So, it was Black Friday in San Francisco, and to dishonor, of one of the most celebrated, dysfunctional days, inside the American Republic, I paid full price, $12.99, for the tea pot, at the local Divisidero, hardware store, a block from the Independent.
It was a simple act of social rebellion, to counter-balance those, so tied into the mass shopping hysteria, who are calling me a fool now for paying full price. To earn the full scoff, of those who shopped, I also waited until 7pm, so that any shopping conquerors, still wandering the streets, in “I got the best deal“ ego satisfaction, illusions, would be home, asking themselves why they wasted 5 hours of their lives, or maxed out credit cards, and like the good sheeple, they are, drove to malls, zombie-like, at 4:00 am, to stand in lines, in front of stores, mind-sucked by advertising moguls, so that transitory objects are beatified and bestowed sainthood by the masses.
I am waiting to see the announcement for the first Vomitorium, like ancient Rome's, to handle the expulsion of their shopping, over-indulgence psychoses.
So, I sit here while North Korea attacks South Korea, again. Afghanistan and Kashmir are being decimated, as cultures, by those who seek to control poppy production, and strategic, nuclear missile sites.
Another 20,000 children starved to death, China declared the US dollar valueless,US Congress is going to stop paying Federal Extended Unemployment Benefits, affecting 40 million, US citizens, which include their families, and the economy, of their cities and villages, and many may have to live on the streets, in their cars, but not on the Capitol Mall, which is where they should go to, so they are seen and not forgotten by their Congressmen and the President‘s advisers.
And Monday night, I may have and adventure with friends,in the San Francisco night that relieves some of the tension in our lives. We understand the insanity of the collusion of world super powers, the possibility of nuclear annihilation, the lack of coverage by mass media, in the past days, that a Chinese, missile-bearing ship, fired a missile, along the Southern California coast, while cruising by US waters. Yes, they fired a missile, to let us all know they can do it, and you didn’t know because we accepted their excuse, or else you were shopping.
I think I need coffee since it is 5:36am, and ready to begin the day I began writing about last night.
One of the great joys about traveling is you never know what is going to happen next,
even if you plan on a the next moment taking place. Realistically, this could be my last breath, and I try to keep balance in my life by repeating that thought, to myself ,whenever I am afraid to take action, or if something comes along of such an unusual nature, and I hesitate to appreciate its power, to possibly rip me out of my habitual activities; the ones which we all follow, in somnolence, which,i f stopped, can lead us into a new dimension, paradigm or relationship, or get us killed.
Spent most of the day writing, talking, eating, and cogitating. If I don’t write every day, my gyroscope gets a little wobbly and something begins knocking against my brain, which is usually another part of the story which needs to be released into the cosmos. As I get closer to the end of my life, my life speeds up in order to experience as much of life as it can before heading into other worlds. I can sit for hours thinking, as all of us do from time to time. Writers’ tendency to find the explanation for their feeling or experience, sometimes takes decades, before the explanation and realization arises, as to what actually changed them and why they chose the path they did at the time.
Luckily, the understanding, of how it all fits, into their world, and affects the outer worlds, of their existence, occurs in a split second of clarity, and in my experience, the realization and understanding involves a sentence or word, which encompasses the totality, of whatever it was I was trying to figure out. I tend to believe that most people are incredulous when the truth reveals itself, and it is always overshadowed by one of the simple laws of the universe. I had a few of those moments today.
One of the joys of spending time with friends is the reflections of self, that are mirrored back during conversations. You get to experience the truth about yourself and also see how far away from crazy you are located, or, how close to madness, you were before the reflections appeared in the mirror. Friends do that for one another, usually without realizing their importance to you. It is nice to let them know you value them, and today I bought my friend a new tea pot, as thanks, for her reflections. Now, I know a tea pot is not a big offering for such a gift, however, my friend and I have spent many tea pots of time together, discussing our lives and dreams, throughout the decades of our friendship.
We have shared friends with one another. I gave her my best friend, Cyndy , when I moved out of San Francisco. She was there while Cyndy was dying, a year I would choose to forget forever.
When I gave the eulogy, to a few hundred of Cyndy's friends and family, realizing how the connections would grow across time and space, I never imagined 15-20 years later, I would meet John, tonight at dinner, who knew Cyndy, because of another simple introduction between friends, once again proving the theroy --Three Degrees of Separation . My friend, in turn, has introduced me to her friends, which prove to be interesting, insightful and adventurous, in one way or another. A girl needs adventure, a writer needs the insights of others, and my life needs to be interesting, in order to continue on paths, which can be lonely, challenging and introspective.
I am here to see if San Francisco can be home again. Walking the streets tonight, enjoying the city, made me realize I have missed walking city streets. There is always something of interest, something that catches the eye, something that makes an impression. It is fodder for a writer, as are the mountains and wild animals that lay at my feet, in the Pacific Northwest. I love both. Which do I need now? Which environment will bring me to the next indicated thing in my life. That is what I am here to discover. My decision to change my life again is in process; where that leads me is still unknown, however, the quest is now in process, and eventually the answer will arise for me.
Every aspect of life feeds creativity in me. I will enjoy doing some more investigating into the charms of the city, tomorrow, when I visit the Asian Art Museum, with no plans for the rest of the day. That is the plan and plans change. It is 5:02 am and tomorrow is now today.
I think planning is sometimes overrated by those who are afraid to leap, when the universe sends in a curve ball, or a person who is a little crazier than you and not afraid to break down a few doors, to find treasures. They do not care if there is no treasure. The only thing, that is important, is they tried to do it. The act of trying is just as important as breaking down the door, and finding possible surprises. Don’t pretend to be interested in life, then shirk from it, when someone offers you an opportunity, to create a little havoc in your life.
Plans are meant to be changed: they are only ideas, not reality. It does not become reality, until you are breaking into places, which you had not planned to enter, and realize you always were meant to be there. You don’t have the key to the door, but you are sure, that what lies beyond is more important, more exciting, than what you planned on doing that day, and you never needed the key anyway.
I am tired from all the fun, today, filled with interesting conversations and the best chicken sambucca, cooked by my caring friend. We enjoyed it with one of her favorite people, who was thoroughly entertaining, erudite, and well-read, and was never afraid to break into new sociological paradigms, where he was not invited, but once he got in, bringing others along with him, he knew they would enjoy the journey, once they realized they were holding the keys. All they had to do was realize anything is possible, even the improbable: a visionary and humble man, all wrapped up in energetic visualizations, who transformed the lives of thousands of people, without many of them realizing, he was and is a catalyst for change.
How many of us get to meet a creative visionary, who helped create an artistic, transformative paradigm, during their lifetime? He may not like this acknowledgement, since that humble, down-to-earth, sincerity is there too, however, he is not afraid to act, which shakes the world out of its somnolence. People like him, take you to the edge of your reality, then jump over the edge, right along side you, knowing all along, that the ride through space has to happen before the next indicated thing arrives.
So, it was Black Friday in San Francisco, and to dishonor, of one of the most celebrated, dysfunctional days, inside the American Republic, I paid full price, $12.99, for the tea pot, at the local Divisidero, hardware store, a block from the Independent.
It was a simple act of social rebellion, to counter-balance those, so tied into the mass shopping hysteria, who are calling me a fool now for paying full price. To earn the full scoff, of those who shopped, I also waited until 7pm, so that any shopping conquerors, still wandering the streets, in “I got the best deal“ ego satisfaction, illusions, would be home, asking themselves why they wasted 5 hours of their lives, or maxed out credit cards, and like the good sheeple, they are, drove to malls, zombie-like, at 4:00 am, to stand in lines, in front of stores, mind-sucked by advertising moguls, so that transitory objects are beatified and bestowed sainthood by the masses.
I am waiting to see the announcement for the first Vomitorium, like ancient Rome's, to handle the expulsion of their shopping, over-indulgence psychoses.
So, I sit here while North Korea attacks South Korea, again. Afghanistan and Kashmir are being decimated, as cultures, by those who seek to control poppy production, and strategic, nuclear missile sites.
Another 20,000 children starved to death, China declared the US dollar valueless,US Congress is going to stop paying Federal Extended Unemployment Benefits, affecting 40 million, US citizens, which include their families, and the economy, of their cities and villages, and many may have to live on the streets, in their cars, but not on the Capitol Mall, which is where they should go to, so they are seen and not forgotten by their Congressmen and the President‘s advisers.
And Monday night, I may have and adventure with friends,in the San Francisco night that relieves some of the tension in our lives. We understand the insanity of the collusion of world super powers, the possibility of nuclear annihilation, the lack of coverage by mass media, in the past days, that a Chinese, missile-bearing ship, fired a missile, along the Southern California coast, while cruising by US waters. Yes, they fired a missile, to let us all know they can do it, and you didn’t know because we accepted their excuse, or else you were shopping.
I think I need coffee since it is 5:36am, and ready to begin the day I began writing about last night.
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